horrible not horriable

i want cherry cover chocolates.
Its been a while, i guess i kinda want my life to be where its at now.
confusing.
"i guess i like the way my life is now"
im done havin fun, well having fun once in a while but not all the time.

im currently in a "sweet romance" movie.
=] hes amazing, unlike the others were too nice
this 0ne is juust right.

xmas is around the corner and its so hard to get somebody something.
huuuyyyyyyy

resolution.

pay off my duties.

Mz. All da way live.

i need to start blogging more, im just never home. =[
omg i feel horriable still from last night.
this sucks.
but hey....
im a terriable person.

Obama for the win.

Obama is our new president, and i just realized this last night..he made the future of america to go out and vote, knowing that he can make a difference in there life.
im just so stoked to see whats he is planning to do now.

My journey is amazing! i love my friends, my ride or die. just everyone in general.

Poppy the Pussycat

think think think.

they should call rice krispies.
cubed rice.

Downtown tampa.

Day time view. Its awesome.


I cant believe i missed the debate cause i went out to eat sushi..

Gosh Bistro.

Is the best damn sushi in my opinion.
and it is hard to spell "opinion".

Went to tampa again yesterday, i wish i could send pictures..
they are amazing.

i also got my oil changed today, ;] i got it for free at jiffy lube.
i got mad skillz.
so if you need your oil change, jiffy lube is the man

Gin and Juice.

I thought gin and juice was a separated mix.
apparently its not.

anyway, moving on...
i went to Downtown Tampa this past Wednesday i believe to visit a friend.
It was sweet, i didn't know there was a school in the middle of downtown
University of Tampa, its such a pretty school, which i would die for.
the architecture and what not.


we went walking around, cause i never actually walked where there is BIG BUILDINGS before. i lied, i have but not like this. and i love his dorm, you see the downtown view at night. amazing.



um you really cant see the view but oh well, anyway.
=] I'm actually enjoying my life, and i need to slow down and settle for a while.
but what i don't get is, why do people think I'm a bad person. when all i want to do is have fun. I'm a Taurus and we like to have fun. haha.
yesterday went to amandas cook out for her "surprise party" they got you there buddy. haha. i wasnt really feelin to swell yesterday but after i let it all go, i was good to go. i forgot how Laos food tasted like, i miss home made meals, we dont hardly cook cambodian food here no more, so im usually buying fast food, which i need to stop. my art show is comming up, and i need to settle and do paintings, atleast finish them up, i have to give them a call. im a slacker, i want to do this so i can get my passion a start, its just the partying thats holding me back. BTW, im getting more hours at my job now, im officialy a server after a year and about 7 months. It was exciting, getting new numbers wink wink lol. I dont get it when people are like, you dont talk to me no more..and the get upset or something, well if i dont text you freakin text me. thats simple.

one more thing.



Lilo and me, the contest winners hahahahahahaha. =] i never won something cool before.

School girl = PORN STAR!

Me and lilo won last night at honey pot. BEST SCHOOL GIRLS! WHOOP! so we received 100 dollars each. it was nice and i met 2 pistols. he is short. but haha, i love honey pot!

Emotional Drunky.

I feel that, i can cry whenever i want to.
walking the lake last night was niice and cool and relaxin and just talkin to the person you love so much. =] my girlfriend, my wife, my best friend. and people ask me..oh your a les. and i say pretty much lmao. no shes my fuckin bestfriend, i lost her through a fire but i found her spirit again lol. my freakin other half. =] i love her, and the things shes dealing with..

FALL IS COMMING I CAN SMELL IT AND FEEL IT!

fly like a bird.

you can get more than ONE CHANCE.
i am ready to move

Art Gone Bad Presents...

I smell..FALL.

I hate having the feeling your going to get sick and having a headache from all the fun you had on the weekend. Im still not done with my painting. gaaaahhhhhhhhhhh ill get it done, i just need finish glosser so it can be shiny. I loved how my was on Friday...it was hooottt..lets see..Friday went to Tampa for Soulers 20th birthday. It was fun..got a lil crazy. but im all good..slept over didn't leave till 12pm. It was crowded in that little apartment. Next time, i want to try to play beer pong. because mary said thats how you start the party, and every party ive gone too...everyone is always playin beer pong. joocccciiiinnnn jaaayyy zzzz so dope boy fresh. and again i met new peoples which was niiiiiice. in my life, ive never party with girls NEVER untill Saturday.

Maybe some of them arent bicthes at all. ;] I SERIOUSLY NEED TO BLOG NORMAL AND INSTEAD OF WRITING ALL OVER THE PLACE AND USING HORRIABLE GRAMMER. i still have a headace from my weekend. 4th weekend straight..out and about. trying to have fun. My sisters hoemcomming pictrues are adorable. but shes still a bitch. One secret about me, in elementary i took speech class, im guessing because i would never talked and im asian and the teacher thought i was foriegn. and stopped goin after 4th grade.. but the teacher was niice. and till this day, my grammer sucks.. its because i hang with my mother too much. and im such a pest. damnit, i need to controll myself.

Kindness kills.

=] i was generous today.
i gave a lady 10 dollars because she was in desperete need so i handed her 10 and all she wanted was 9 and along with that i gave her my article LOL..

and i feel bad for my sis...she doesnt even go out anywhere..and i know the reason whyy..><; she deserves better...
if anyone is looking for a hot HOT asian girl that is 19 bout to 20 in dec. BIG JUGS looks like me but wayyy better...holler at me. ;] i love my sister

For the record.

I cannot Bake or Make cookies..
I thought i could this morning, but i am wrong.
I can not cook PERIOD

I lied.

I said i was going to choke a bitch. But she came through for me. Pick up at your nearest...Recees Clif watson clinic or anywhere that you can find Focus magazine. Im so excited and proud of myself, i see potential. I searched everywhere monday, but couldnt find it untill my lovely sister called me up and said "Mrs. Rodriguez saw you in that Focus article." and i was so shocked..so i went with ryan and find the beast..and GRABBED A WHOLE LOAD OF THE MAGAZINE, and one of the cook was like God Damn so i had to explain to him whats going on. Gosh im so excited, =] i feel like a rockstar..and i def feel like being crowned queeen and conquer the world.

Tonight is the art show, and CONGRATZ TO MARK FOR WINNING Best of the bay!!! Be there or be square. ;] And sometimes how i feel that someone wants me so bad but whatever. and its strange how he still has my house number. Anyways, i love every single of one of you and Jen coooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmeeeeeee back and lets celebrate and DO NOT FORGET ABOUT MY PHILIPPINE SOUVENIR HE HAS TO BE CUTE SO I CAN MARRY HIM AND MAKE HIM A CITIZEN IN THE US lol. LOVE YOU GUYS THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT AND THE SWEET COMPLIMENTS KEEP THEM ROLLING!

Unbroken Vow.

I broke my promise. oh gawd, this weekend was fun. i wish i could upload pictures from my phone..hmm ill find a way. anyway, that picture is from Diego's party,from LR Jose me mary and lizet..I HAD FUN idk about other people, and i was out of it [Notice the botox face.] ..but this time i was a good girl. ;] and Friday, went to club skye..and had fun there..meet new people..i think thats my goal meetin new people every weekend. Also today is the 15. and im about to FUCKIN CHOKE A BITCH cause im not in the freakin article...and i search alll around town findin this beast...i must talk to her..


Ps. im having so much fun and im fine with out you. ;] keep that in mind

Mental Note.

You got to go through the experience just to learn the mistakes.
no one is perfect in any way..

Vow.

I vow to not drink anymore.
i only drank 3 x's in my life..
one in may and the 2nd one on labor day and the 3rd one last night.

I went to erics party last night in orlando.
wish i took pictures but ohhhh weelll..
i was out of it.. and crazy stuff happens
when i am tipsy, i am a light weight cause i dont drink period
but ever since me and him are over
i was like hey what the heck!

crazy stuff happens to me when i do drink..no more!

#1 to do list.

Work larger!

"And now that we’re done
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine"

and i did
but than he acted all crazy and jealously kicks in...

anyway..im havin so much fun and im fine without him

the best of me.

I let the best get to me.
how can someone still be so low.
im so hurt.
take me for granted, maybe it just wasnt suppose to be
HES A FUCKING ASSHOLE WHO WILL NEVER LEARN! AND HE WILL SEE HOW GOOD HE GOT IT AGAIN!
SOMEONE TO BE THE BACK BONE FOR HIS DOWN PARTS! NO ONE ELSE CANT BEAT ME!
and hes going to have to fucking learn! HES A FUCKING ASSHOLES, and i let him get to me.
he thinks its funny, hes happy cause im so upset. FUCKING FUCKER! HE NEEDS THEARAPY!!!!

GROW SOME BALLS ASSHOLE! BE A MAN! fucking 20 my ass.

I can feel it.

=] so the most excitin news came through today.
Someone asked me to be feature in their magazine as a local artist.
WHICH IM SO EXCITED!
Thanks James and Mark for helping me. =]

So i will be feature in the magazine called Focus Magazine which is around lakeland i guess.
but anyway, =] this makes me want to do more work and grab my other works from school. oh man im so excited, i can just feel it.

and i just need to get up and accomplish my goal. ;]

maybe..

who knows maybe one day we were meant to be..

Happy Birthday Julie!

I had to work yesterday because we were busy...so i didn't really get the chance to make it to Julies birthday dinner, but i did anyway after work and it twas niice. So happy 18 lady! Than afterward, met up with the significant other at orange bowl, which was really embarrassing to attend, and it kinda went sour due to his lack of respect towards me, its all ok now. he just needs to learn not smoke around me and to learn how to quit. thats the one thing i hate, SMOKERS!

I had sushi last night, so delicious. I wish my tamali wouldnt be so mad at me still...

American Dream.

I think me being a non-smoker and a non-drinker makes me become an all american good dream girl.. =]

a little UMHP!

its just the feeling im having that scares me. ugh.
Theres an Art show next month and i cant wait to go.

;] im going to be famous, you will see
i need to work on my skills...
things are rollin down hill so fast...

----
i really need to correct my grammer.

Help.

Sia-Breathe Me
this is officially my lonley song lol

Successful.

I feel like im goin to make money in 2 years.
i need to stop talkin about bein rich and actually do something to become famous and well known.
yeah im the shit.

other than that, im a failure to life and a disgrace to my people.
school wasnt meant for everybody.

Yesterday meets Today..

Yesterday kindergarden, today college.

Everyone is leaving, and i really want to start school but i dont know what my problem is.

Michale Phelps has did it again this year, so much better than last year..top dog of the world!

Love is amazing right now, if only it wouldnt change next month.

Reality is getting worse, how am I suppose to know?

Back!

i got a phone finally, but its a differ number, so who ever ask for will recieve!

bad dream.

i had a dream that i was going to jail..

its official!

im done with him, its over time to move on yay!

all out of breath.

it feels like when i try to make an attempt.
he just wash it all away.
scared of who might see what i wrote to him.

we are on a break but maybe its a good thing, i really dont know how to feel
i really dont want him no more, its just i cannot take it no more
keep thinkin that he mighht do something wrong
and i am not the one who needs stuff like that.

it feels like im really wasting my breath and wastin the words when i write it to him.. he doesnt understand..

hmmm maybe i shouldnt keep him around, someone will be better.

Here we go.

I thought i sold my first piece, but i really think its a scam.
The buyer sounds like a true player, the way he express his feelings. hehe.
Its a scam i think.

STUPID CRAIGS LIST!

undecided.

Prom.

Oh how much i miss prom. it was a fun night no curfew at all.(lol) and im missing how fun it was with the people i all love. now its the end and everyone is going seperate ways. gaahhhhhhhhh i thank Lucia and Cridal for the last minute shopping, thanks Ivanka Sky for the amazing sexy dress.

I enjoyed every last minus of it. the sad thing was, i didnt get the chance to take lots of picture with everyone..oh how much i will miss highschool years. The after prom party, everyone getting wasted and me not getting wasted cause i do not drink (drink responsibly please) and wakin up the next day with someone haha..going to dennys and jasen driving us back to lakeland...oh the good times

im so late at posting about prom, i just never wrote about it.

going nuts.

today im gonna look for a 2nd job, cause this 1 job isnt workin for me and my bill.
it feels like im gettin ripped off of my hours. and its so hard to get a job anywhere because i dont know where to start or begin with. and it just makes me upset and im going nuts, cause money is a big thing to me now. i learn that you cannot survive without having any form of money on you.

this is a very tough lesson in life, and i still don't understand why i am struggling with everything still. this just makes me so upset.

un-real

my life never gets any better.
im ready to move out
i can't take the horrible music comming
from my mothers mouth
im so ready to move out

things are not getting better i feel like
commitin suicide
im so angry with everyone right now
i wanna go away somewhere far.

#1 rule.

someone once told me the number one rule on myspace
dont post all your sneaker pictures online..
make it a surprise

5yrs in the making.

its been 5yrs now since i had xanga.
its nice to see how much i change.
i use to keep diaries now i blog.
oh how much i miss those days when im gettin ready for bed
my journal will be by my side
oh how much things have change

i wanted to move on with a new blog
but i feel like this is more private to me
and i dont want to keep going back and forth
posting new blogs
oh how much i will miss xanga.

blogging is the best way to let your o-pin-oin go and set free

kill romance.

oh how much i hate romance.
it just kills me.
i hate the feeling of being upset all the time
i admit. i am a crazy bitch, now thats just something i wouldnt admit.

that night.

the night i felt like i was the shit.

the crisis of joy.

what is a girl to do.
i need to focus and pay attention to my real life.
how lucky i am.
such a broker